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You Will Not Recognize Your Life

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You Will Not Recognize Your Life

By: Micaela Blei
Narrated by: Micaela Blei
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About this listen

Can you really conjure the life of your dreams? And what if you say the wrong spell?

It’s 2006. After a string of rejections from men who tell her they could never, ever, ever see her “that way,” awkward third-grade teacher Micaela Blei signs up for a mysterious course called “The Divine Feminine,” and feels like she might have found the key to the perfect life.

Turns out if you’re an A student, you can get an A in anything–including men. Pretty soon she’s learning to "conjure" her desires with vision boards, flirtations, and even a daring jumbotron viewing party for her, ahem ... "divine center." But the more Micaela aces her assignments, and watches her most unlikely dreams come true, the more she wonders: Is her perfect new life the real thing, or is there a hidden cost to getting everything she thought she wanted?

Women have put themselves through a lot of f*cked up situations to feel valued and lovable. This is a sharply funny, often painfully relatable true story featuring the great tropes of early 2000s romantic comedies: self-discovery, dating disasters, epic makeover montages, and finding love where you never thought to look.

Praise for Micaela’s storytelling:

"Ms. Blei’s story was magical and riveting ... in the end, you really wanted her to be your teacher." (Lara O’Brien, MV Times)

“Micaela is a storytelling wizard. She transforms the stuff of everyday life into profound stories that move people–and make them laugh.” (Tyler Wetherall, author of No Way Home: A Memoir of Life on the Run and Amphibian)

“Micaela Blei's storytelling is fresh, hilarious, and surprisingly moving.” (Sarah Moore, Theatre Is Easy)

©2024 Micaela Blei (P)2024 Audible Originals, LLC.
Love, Dating & Attraction Relationships Women Funny Witty
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The author was honest, genuine and humorous. I enjoyed each chapter of the story and would love to hear more from her.

Just amazing

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really appreciate the author’s honest and humour. nice to listen to I enjoyed it ......

very funny

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I absolutely LOVED listening to this books, it was truly insightful - as a woman in my 40’s so many moments resonated and were so humorous!

What a great journey to go on in this story.

Perfectly written!

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Interesting how even when you do something to boost your womanhood you think about please men. It’s a shame.

Interesting

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I didn’t even know what this book is going to be about, just downloaded a lot of self improvement books snd this was the next on my list.
I normally listen to audio books when I’m working. I’m a housekeeper.
I laughed out loud in places and was really interested in where she was going with her story. I had to pause 3/4 way in and actually couldn’t wait for my next work day to hear the rest of the book!
It’s definitely fun, surprising and engaging all the way through. She is definitely performing and not just reading. A delight! Highly recommend!!

Fun and engaging!

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