In episode 4, we welcome Jen, a social worker from the Netherlands, who shares her experiences navigating the neurodivergent world with depth and vulnerability. Jen delves into the hidden costs of masking, the profound joy of unmasking, and the concept of “autistic joy”—those pure, unfiltered moments of delight in being true to oneself.

Haje and Jen explore the challenges of growing up undiagnosed and the journey toward self-identification as autistic. They discuss how masking can lead to burnout, the importance of creating inclusive workplaces, and the nuanced understanding of what it means to be authentically autistic. Jen also highlights her experience at Autscape, an autism-friendly conference, as a turning point in feeling deeply seen and understood.

This episode is a heartfelt exploration of resilience, acceptance, and the transformative power of connection. Join us for a candid conversation about the costs of masking, the beauty of autistic joy, and the possibilities of creating a world where difference is celebrated.

You can find more of Jen on TikTok, at @Jen.The.Rainbow, and she has a Dutch TikTok at @JenTheRainbowNL. You can also find her on YouTube at @JenTheRainbow.

Topics Covered:

• The challenges of late autism identification

• Masking and its impact on well-being

• Autistic joy and its significance

• Creating inclusive workspaces for neurodivergent individuals

• The role of self-identification and formal diagnoses

• Building authentic relationships while navigating masking

• Jen’s reflections on the Autscape conference as a space of belonging

Trigger Warnings: Brief mentions of burnout and mental health challenges. Listen at your discretion.

In episode 3, we speak with Nikki, a young autistic woman, about her journey to self-discovery and acceptance. Nikki opens up about what it means to navigate life with a late autism diagnosis, the emotional challenges of masking, and the sense of validation she found in embracing her neurodivergent identity.

Together, Haje and Nikki discuss the complexities of growing up as an autistic woman, including the pressure to conform, the struggle to find an understanding therapist, and the alarming rates of abuse faced by autistic women. Nikki also shares practical advice on finding support and community, from connecting with other neurodivergent individuals to discovering safe spaces on social media.

This episode shines a light on autism as both a part of identity and a lens through which autistic individuals experience the world—a world often unprepared for them. Join us for an honest conversation that dives deep into resilience, community, and the power of self-acceptance.

Trigger Warning: Brief mentions of sexual violence statistics. Listen at your discretion.

Topics Covered:

• The journey to an autism diagnosis

• The importance of neurodivergent therapists

• Navigating stereotypes and gender biases in autism

• The challenges of masking and self-acceptance

• Finding community and connection within the neurodivergent world

• Insights into autism and abuse statistics

• Nikki’s reflections on identity, resilience, and belonging

Nikki Skara received her autism diagnosis in 2023 after a few years of research and speculation. Since then, she has made it her life's goal to promote acceptance and understanding for autistic people of all stripes. Nikki enjoys writing, songwriting, making video essays, gaming, cosplaying, and adding to her ever-increasing Lego collection.

She is a proud aunt to four naughty yet adorable cats.

Find her on YouTube under @itsnikkis, on TikTok on @nikkisingsandotherthings and Instagram under the same handle (@nikkisingsandotherthings).

About Nikki

Nikki Skara received her autism diagnosis in 2023 after a few years of research and speculation. Since then, she has made it her life's goal to promote acceptance and understanding for autistic people of all stripes. Nikki enjoys writing, songwriting, making video essays, gaming, cosplaying, and adding to her ever-increasing Lego collection.

She is a proud aunt to four naughty yet adorable cats.

Find her on YouTube under @itsnikkis, on TikTok on @nikkisingsandotherthings and Instagram under the same handle (@nikkisingsandotherthings).

In this episode of Autistic FM, Haje Kamps and Sofi Elkin delve into the complexities of communication in relationships, particularly for neurodivergent individuals. Sofi opens up about her journey toward discovering her neurodivergence in adulthood and how unmasking has profoundly affected her relationship dynamics. She discusses the process of realizing that both she and her partner had been masking their communication styles, leading to misunderstandings and frustration early on in their relationship. Over time, Sofi and her partner learned to communicate more authentically, understanding that as neurodivergent individuals, they would need to approach communication in ways that felt true to themselves rather than conforming to neurotypical norms.

A central theme of their conversation is learning to handle conflict and regulate emotions together. Sofi shares how, through couples therapy and continuous self-reflection, she and her partner developed tools to address conflict in a healthy way. They prioritize creating a safe emotional space for one another, which allows them to navigate difficult conversations without fear or resentment. Weekly check-ins have become a ritual where they openly discuss what went well or what could be improved, which helps reduce miscommunication and promotes empathy. By establishing these routines, Sofi emphasizes that she and her partner have strengthened their relationship and made conflict less daunting.

Sofi is an AuDHD content creator, online sex educator, and "jack of all trades" (master of few). She grew up in Costa Rica and is a "third culture child". Her neurodivergence went undiagnosed until adulthood, which led her to using her platform to spread awareness and advocate for other late or self-diagnosed ADHD and autistic folks.

You can find more of Sofi on Instagram (@SofiXElkin) and TikTok (@_Sofisticated)