How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more.

It’s episode 299…My mommy always said there were no monsters. No real ones. But there are.

Alien Resurrection (1997) is the concluding chapter in the Alien Quadrilogy, and introduces Ripley 8, a supercharged Xeno-human hybrid of Ellen Ripley, cloned in a lab to act as a genetic vessel to recover the Xenomorphs from the annals of history 200 years after both they and Ripley were obliterated in molten lava at the end of Alien 3. It really is as simple as that.

We settle some unfinished business with the lesser-loved film in one of our favourite franchises, talk about the pros and cons of 90s cool girl action, query the logic of bringing a ticking time bomb along as a passenger, and indeed the logic of firing a continent-sized bomb at Earth to save lives, and marvel at the biggest and best shoulder hair ever captured on film.

All of which leads to one question: How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure: Ellen Ripley died trying to wipe this species out. For all intents and purposes, she succeeded!

Next time on the Patreon, we’re covering Jacob’s Ladder, ahead of our big episode 300 triple bill on the Fear Street trilogy.

How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more.

It’s episode 298…and at 50, it all stops.

The Substance (2024) follows Elisabeth Sparkle, a fading Hollywood star who is fired from her TV fitness show when she reaches 50. Learning of ‘The Substance’, a black market pharmaceutical product that promises to create ‘a better version of you’, she signs up, producing Sue - a younger, idealised version of herself who soon finds the stardom Elisabeth has lost. But, despite being the same person, Elisabeth and Sue become increasingly fractious roommates, and as their contempt for one another grows, disaster ensues.

We break down one of the best films of the last year, a tour-de-force of body horror maximalism, featuring a million shots of an arse, disgusting eating sounds and jaw-dropping prosthetic effects. But is it good? Does it, while highlighting the objectification of women, objectify women in turn? And how much arse is too much arse? All this and more to come.

All of which leads to one question: How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure: Everything comes from you. Everything is you. This is simply a better version of yourself.

Anyone can feel strong hiding behind a piece of metal. I prefer to know my own strength.

Love Lies Bleeding (2024) tells the story of Lou, a gym owner who falls in love with Jackie, a gym user who plans to enter a bodybuilding contest. As they fall deeper in love, they become tied up in violence, deception and crime - all thanks to Lou’s family and their violent, deceitful, criminal ways.

We offer investigation tips to the FBI, question whose perspective you can really trust, and question the true romantic intention in giving someone drugs the moment you meet them.

All of which leads to one question:

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

It's the ones you love the most who always disappoint you in the end.