Pillow Talks cover art

Pillow Talks

Pillow Talks

By: Vanessa & Xander Marin | QCODE
Listen for free

About this listen

 Meet Vanessa and Xander Marin, your new BFF couple friends! She’s a sex therapist with 20 years of experience and he’s a regular dude. Together they’re the shockingly open, slightly nerdy, and seriously funny couple you want to grab sushi with. They share the ups and downs in their relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours. Subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally do-able sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more. It’s the sex education you WISH you’d had!2024 Hygiene & Healthy Living
Episodes
  • EPISODE 213: What Do Men REALLY Think About…? Part 3 (Doggy Style, Smut + Morning BJs & More!)

    EPISODE 213: What Do Men REALLY Think About…? Part 3 (Doggy Style, Smut + Morning BJs & More!)
    Jun 19 2025
    Have you ever wanted a peek inside a man’s brain? 🧠 We’re back with Part 3 of one of our most talked-about episode series — answering all the burning, bizarre, and brutally honest questions you’ve always wanted to ask men. This week, we’re diving into what men really think about everything from doggy style to smutty books to whether they actually want to be woken up with a BJ. 🍆 😛 🎙️ Here’s what we’re getting into: What are men actually looking at during doggy style? What do they think when they see a woman who’s prettier than their partner? Is it true they can literally… think about nothing? How do they feel about things like… Women aging, messy buns, leg hair, and more How do they stay so chill about daily life stuff (kid schedules, groceries, appointments)? What’s their take on sex toys and spicy books in the bedroom? What really keeps them engaged in a relationship? This one is honest, funny, and surprisingly vulnerable. And of course, Xander’s not holding back. 🔗 Links & Resources: 🎧 What Do Men REALLY Think About…? Part 1 ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode56 🎧 What Do Men REALLY Think About…? Part 2 ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode69 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Your questions deserve more than just a quick answer. Inside our monthly membership Deeper, we help you actually take the next step — with expert-designed tools, guided content, live sessions with us, and unlimited access to Vanessa AI (your 24/7 virtual sex and relationship coach). 🎉 Podcast listeners get 25% off your first month! Use the code PILLOW at checkout right here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ **https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander** 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Goodwipes. Goodwipes will elevate your everyday hygiene with premium wipes that deliver a superior clean that no dry toilet paper can match. 👏 Thanks ZocDoc. Download the ZocDoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor. ➡︎ https://zocdoc.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off. ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks 👏Thanks Remi. Give your teeth a break without breaking the bank with Remi and save up to 50%. ➡︎ https://shopremi.com/PILLOW) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 6 mins
  • EPISODE 212: Why You Flinch When Your Partner Touches You (And How To Fix It) "The Bristle Reaction”

    EPISODE 212: Why You Flinch When Your Partner Touches You (And How To Fix It) "The Bristle Reaction”
    Jun 12 2025
    Have you heard of The Bristle Reaction? It’s a term Vanessa coined—and when we posted about it on TikTok, over 8 million people watched. (You can watch that here 👉 https://www.tiktok.com/@vanessaandxander/video/7206335375453867306?lang=en) The Bristle Reaction is that moment when your partner reaches out for a hug or a kiss… and your body instinctively recoils. Even when you love your partner deeply, their touch can sometimes create a sense of tension or irritation—and it’s more common than you think. We asked our Instagram audience, and a whopping 84% said they’ve experienced this reaction. But the question we keep hearing is: “How do we fix it?” In this episode, we break down: The 3 biggest reasons The Bristle Reaction happens 6 actionable ways to start enjoying your partner’s touch again Why this topic hits so close to home for so many couples If physical affection has started to feel complicated or triggering, this episode will give you clarity, tools, and hope. 🔗 Links & Resources: 📘 Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life 📝 Initiation 101 Guide ➡️ https://buy.vmtherapy.com/art-of-initiation?ref=podcast-212&utm_term=podcast-212 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Your questions deserve more than just a quick answer. Inside our monthly membership Deeper, we help you actually take the next step — with expert-designed tools, guided content, live sessions with us, and unlimited access to Vanessa AI (your 24/7 virtual sex and relationship coach). 🎉 Podcast listeners get 25% off your first month! Use the code PILLOW at checkout right here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/deeper ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏 Thanks Blissy. Get better sleep, hair, and skin with Blissy. Get an additional 30% off ➡︎ https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD. 👏Thank you goPure. For a limited time, get 25% off. ➡︎ https://www.gopurebeauty.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off. ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks 👏 Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial PLUS 25% off your annual subscription ➡︎ https://dipseastories.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 18 mins
  • EPISODE 211: Ask A Sex Therapist: Penis Pumps, Pegging, + Postpartum Sex

    EPISODE 211: Ask A Sex Therapist: Penis Pumps, Pegging, + Postpartum Sex
    Jun 5 2025
    Ask a sex therapist is back! Have you ever Googled something about sex and then immediately deleted your search history? 🥵 In this week’s episode, Vanessa (a sex therapist with 20+ years of experience) and Xander (her ever-curious, regular dude husband) answer your most personal, pressing, wait-am-I-the-only-one? questions about sex, intimacy, and everything in between. Here’s what we’re diving into: Is it weird if my partner and I don’t kiss during sex? (Pretty Woman, anyone?) What exactly is pegging? Is it normal for other things to be “better than sex”? Can using a penis pump have consequences? Should you get a vasectomy? (Xander’s in the club!) Postpartum sex — what are men really thinking? Can responsive/spontaneous desire be taught? Like can you switch your type? ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Your questions deserve more than just a quick answer. Inside our monthly membership Deeper, we help you actually take the next step — with expert-designed tools, guided content, live sessions with us, and unlimited access to Vanessa AI (your 24/7 virtual sex and relationship coach). 🎉 Podcast listeners get 25% off your first month! Use the code PILLOW at checkout right here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/deeper Resources Mentioned: Ultimate Foreplay Guides 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/foreplay Ultimate Sex Guides 👉🏻 https://buy.vmtherapy.com/ultimate-sex-guide?ref=podcast-211&utm_term=podcast-211 🎧 Stay connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ ⁠https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander⁠ 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 ⁠vmtherapy.com/subscribe⁠ 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 9 mins
All stars
Most relevant  
I follow Vanessa and Xander on Instagram and love watching their stories and posts. I was really excited about their podcast when it came out and it didn't disappoint. So nice to listen to more in depth information about relationships and sex. The podcast is so easy and enjoyable to listen to!

Love this podcast!

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.