Showing results by author "JB Trepagnier" in All Categories

Rush Limbaugh recently did a radio show that President Obama was paying lesbians to become farmers to infiltrate rural areas for some nefarious purpose. Jeb thinks his farm is safe, way out where he lives, at least for the next year or so while he comes up with a plan to drive the invading lesbians out when they do show up. Jeb was not expecting the lesbians to arrive on 15-foot-high Clydesdales with demonic red eyes and a cow named Anne Boleyn. Will the lesbians run Jeb out of business and steal his wife, who sometimes has opinions he fears? What do these lesbians want?

Liam Collins wants to be a writer more than anything else. After unceremoniously being laid off from his job at the paper after thirty-seven-years, he thinks he finally has time to write that book. As his writer’s block continues, he spends his time gardening and brewing his own beer. One day, he notices someone has been stealing peas in his garden in the idyllic Irish countryside. Only meaning to scare them off, he accidentally shoots someone in the dark in his patch. Following them to the Hawthorn tree, there is a wailing girl up there dressed in strange, ripped clothing who doesn’t appear to understand him or have the ability to speak except in strange noises.

Aeron had every opportunity to explain the horses that were haunting my drawings. I asked him several times about his crazy zombie-killing horse. He omitted to tell me he was the Horseman of Death until Leif let it slip he was the Horseman of Pestilence when he introduced himself to me. I don’t know who I’m madder at—Aeron for lying to me or me for just ignoring all the clues and telling myself there was no way it was possible and trusting him.

Bette Poole, once the biggest child star in the world, is struggling at 25. She's got the talent for adult roles but none of the drive. She can't function without cocaine, booze, and opiates, and it's affecting her performance on set. Jerry, her agent, makes one last attempt to help her by getting her on a reality TV show. Bette's studio-executive father doesn't want to help but pulls the plug on the first day of shooting. Jerry inserts himself into her life, moving into her apartment to get her sober and working. It's worse than Jerry thought.